To the pursuit of a long, healthy life!


on October 14, 2015

rose & flower

When we want to make changes in and improve upon our lives, whether it be physical, mental, or emotional, one of the most important and often most difficult things to remember is to start from a place of love and kindness towards ourselves. Many of us have been trained to be hard on ourselves in order to ‘push through’ and ‘make things happen’. Although this may work in the short term, it sets up a dynamic with ourselves that says we’re not ok where we are right now, that this isn’t a good starting point, that we “should be” somewhere else or have things figured out better already. There are very good, very real reasons for the struggles each of us encounter in our lives. And being hard on ourselves doesn’t allow us to acknowledge the fact that given all the circumstances, we have really done the best we could do to get where we are now. And we have worked hard on our own behalf. That’s not to let us off the hook, but rather a way to frame where we can start from. Instead of saying, “I’m not happy with how things are and I just need to kick myself to get there”, we can instead say something like, “I have done the best that I could to get where I am now and I”m pleased with myself for getting this far, and I’d like to change some things and achieve the goals I have for myself.” And, for most of us, the next step is…”and I could use a little help getting there.” We’re also conditioned to try and figure things out all by ourselves, when in fact, even a little help can go a very long way, and we actually can function better as humans when we know there is another person who cares that we achieve our goals for ourselves and will champion our efforts.

So, try thinking of one thing you are pleased with about yourself, something you are pleased you did to get where you are today. If you think of more than one, great! And use that place of feeling pleased with yourself as a starting point towards achieving your goals. Then ask yourself, “What do I want to do from here? What’s my next step?” And maybe, “Who could support me in my endeavors?” Or, “Who already gives me love and support for my dreams and desires?”

Feel free to share things you’ve done and are pleased with, I’d love to hear them. Have a great day!



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